Stay On Target

During the holiday season my children asked me to watch the movie “Star Wars” with them so my crocheting came out as the DVD marathon began. We got to the part I the fourth episode as Luke Skywalker and his pilot comrades are on their mission to destroy the Death Star. To complete their goal they need to fly down a long narrow crevice, locate a small hole then send their weapon into it, which will start a chain reaction of destruction. They, of course, are flying at self-destruct speed. The camera is taking you on this journey with them which always makes me close my eyes so my stomach will not self destruct as well. While on the mission you see Luke’s buddies crashing and burning off the sidewalls as the enemy pursues them. You begin to understand the dangers they are up against. One wrong move sends them spiraling off their course. Luke has control command watching his progress and talking to him through his headset. These words rang into my own ears has I heard them telling Luke to, “Stay on target.” Over and over they repeated this directive to him, which helped him focus on the task at hand while not worrying about the chaos that was taking place all around him. These words of advice were repeated several times until finally another voice told him to, “Trust you senses,” so he turned off the radio. He was prepared to listen to the inner voice. In doing so he completed his goal, returned the hero and received his reward. This was a great end to a Hollywood drama.

We had a great Gospel discussion as we watched this part of the movie about life and how each of us have a mission to accomplish and how we need to stay focused while the world spins around us. I was not prepared for the call I got just a couple days later that brought this real life narrow crevice into reality. The surprise call was not from one of my children but a girl that I had watched grow up and had mentored thought her teen years. After a brief update on her life she informed me that she was getting married the next week to a non-member whom she had met just a few months before. I, of course, was secretly heartsick. My time for giving advice was over.

I became friends with this young woman in her teen years and watched as she earned her young women medallion. I observed her with pride as she became a leader among her friends and excelled in her talents. I shared the drama as she motivated her high school boyfriend to go on a mission while she went off to college. Everything looked promising in her life if she would just stay the course. Then the unpredictable happened. She lost sight of her long-term goals. As she went off to college the constant, “Stay on Target,” voices of mentors and friends were gone. Her missionary came home but she had changed too much him to reach his eternal goals. He went his own way. Money for school ran out so she had to drop out of college. Her life to her seemed to be in a spiral downward spin into that deep crevice. When life got hard she lost sight of what she really wanted. She forgot to listen to the spirit voice that would have guided her through this momentary trial.

We women are not only mothers to our own children but we influence everyone with whom we come in contact. I’m sure you’ve heard the cliché, “It take a village to raise a child.” I find this to be true. My own children are better people because of their association with others. Sometimes it is easier for young people to ask advice from a third party rather than their own parents. I am grateful for everyone who has reinforced my values and stands to my children as they have expanded their center of influence.

I have thought over and over what happened in this young women’s life? Where did the voices go telling her to, “ Stay on Target?” Did I let her down by not keeping in contact with her? Was her preparation to listen to her own inner voice not complete? I many never know the answers to these questions and it may not be any of these scenarios but I can’t help but wonder.

I’ve heard the saying several times that, “Sometimes we trade what we want most for the things we want now.” In our world of instant gratification many of our children want a quick happiness not realizing that true happiness takes years to achieve with many struggles along the way. I wondered if in the lessons I taught this young woman that maybe I prepared her for a wedding instead of a marriage? The two are totally different. One is momentary, an event, whereas the other is eternal. My lessons taught will have a new focus from now on. My own children will be told over and over again that the moment is fleeting. Choices and more importantly their consequences are long lasting sometimes even eternal.

My young friend who has made a choice in her life that I would have advised against has not self-destructed. She will continue on and her path will just bring other challenges and choices that she will have to make decisions on. It is my attitude that has changed because of her. I will not let her down again. It may be a different face next time but I have learned form the past. I will always be ther3e to gently say, “Stay on target,” to the children in my realm of influence. We all need that mentor no matter how old we get to remind us what it is, “we really want most!”